Over the past several months, I’ve been getting little nudges from the universe, encouraging me to write.  I saw a post on Glennon Doyle Melton’s Momastery (if you haven’t seen her stuff yet, you should check out her blog:  http://momastery.com/) encouraging folks to write if they feel a hankering to write.  I felt as if it was a personal message just to me.  Then, a few days later, I encountered another message, from a stranger, praising the need for all to share our stories.   I heard it and didn’t do a darn thing.

I’ve stopped and started a blog several times now – almost like a diet – vowing that I’m going to write one post a week, only to fall off the wagon before barely starting, eeking out one post every few months.  I can blame my life of course. I’m a Mama of two young boys, who also works and manages everything in the house.  And if I’m honest, I can also point to the fear of revealing myself.   What if no one likes what I have to say?  What if people think my ideas are stupid?  What if no one reads what I write?  What if they do like it?  What does this all mean?

And then, this past week I came across another quote (several times, in fact), “What people think of you is none of your business.”  Now the universe is addressing my fears?  It is rather comical, when you think about it.   As a bona-fide people pleaser, I’m so busy taking care of everyone else that I’m great at ignoring that little voice inside of me or asking for what I want. 

There are also the very real obstacles that I encounter multiple times a day.  In fact, mid-sentence, my toddler began screaming hysterically from his bed and it appears his nap is now over.  So there goes ME time for today and forget the flow….  But I know I’m not the only one who lives in a time-crunch, and if everyone else I love to read can manage to figure it out, I can too.

I do take comfort in the fact that many authors I admire, Anne Lamott, Anna Quindlen, Elizabeth Gilbert, and Glennon Doyle Melton have all reported being terrified before writing a story. If they’re scared, then what does that mean for me?  These people are geniuses!

In Mark Nepo’s Book of Awakening on May 30, his reflection is titled, If not now, when? Mark Nepo’s amazing words of wisdom aside, I heard you universe, I got the message.  (And if you don’t know about Mark Nepo’s Book of Awakening yet, check it out.  This one is a keeper!  Even Oprah thinks so.)

So here we go with another attempt at this blog thing.  I’m not going to set “goals” because that seems just like a sure-fire way for me to fail.  Instead, I promise to show up at the page when I feel something percolating inside of me.  I will not worry (too much) about what people have to say and I will somehow manage to find “me” time in the middle of my busy, but wonderful life.

If not now, when?